I’ve Grown Up Now and Want Something
Carol (names have been changed) has been married for 20 years to a man 15 years
her senior. They met when she was fresh out of university and fell in love. He was a successful
business man and Carol was starting her career path. Over the years, they have both concentrated on their
careers and building the family assets. For a few years Carol has been unsettled and not happy in her
marriage, and when she eventually contacted Jackie she wanted to tell her husband that although she loved him,
she wasn’t in love with him. He was a good friend, a good man, but not someone with whom she felt a
Jackie worked with Carol for a couple of months and during that time she found the courage to tell her
husband how she felt. By speaking in weekly telephone calls over 12 sessions, Carol was able to find her voice and her
feet. She had been scared of doing this for fear of upsetting him, and wondering what might
Focusing from the outset on what Carol’s ideal situation would be and how she would feel, Jackie set
about exploring where the real block was. Giving Carol the opportunity to be entirely honest with herself,
it became apparent that ‘being nice’ and ‘being grateful for what you’ve got’ had held her back from creating a
life for herself in which she shone rather than existed. At all times keeping the possibility of being able
to find the new life by making tweaks to the old one lest divorce wasn’t necessary, they proceeded through a
variety of coaching and NLP steps.
“...... Then I found myself
facing a brick wall that I could find no way over, under or around. Jackie showed me how to break the wall down
brick by brick, she then helped me to walk through. The best bit is that Jackie doesn’t just leave you there.
Jackie allows you to see that at the other side of that wall there is a great big beautiful world just waiting
Only when Carol was completely certain of how she was feeling, and with an ability to express it, did
she then speak to her husband. Rather than be angry, he realised what mistakes he’d made during the
marriage and set about putting things right. Unfortunately it was too late for Carol. They have
remained good friends and their separation has been very amicable and adult - both wanting to support one
another going forward.
Exploring the world of self development can create marital
Susan was desperately unhappy in her long marriage and felt that they both were living separate lives
even though they ran the family business together. She said she still loved her husband and didn’t know
whether to divorce or not. She felt that she was not an equal partner either at home, nor at work. She
wanted more from life and had started to attend self development courses which helped her understand herself
better - this unfortunately just led to greater discontent.
Working with Jackie she was able to address the particular areas one by one and each week she
practised her learnings and found that instead of being dis-satisfied, she was beginning to find pleasure in her
home and work life.
Susan had started to learn about the Law of Attraction, The Secret, Astrology and various other self
help tools. She was finding it a challenge to be able to use them and grow while at the same time
maintaining her business and personal relationship with her husband. During their time together she learned
how to put into practice what she’d been reading by being coached and taught how to use it in her own situation
by Jackie. At the same time, Jackie used NLP and Timeline Therapy techniques to create the perfect
environment for Susan to get rid of her blocks.
Susan worked with Jackie over a
period of 6 months by telephone and had one half day face to face meeting. She found ways to communicate,
stop controlling, start relaxing and start living. Over the weeks she became astounded as her
husband responded positively to her... and he didn’t even know Susan was working with Jackie! It was
the changes she was making which were creating the difference all round.
“Thank you Jackie - ur relationship feels young and invigorated and we are better business partners
Stopped Talking to Each
This couple came to spend a weekend in Edinburgh to address various issues which had arisen in their
marriage. Jason was getting upset at the thought that Fiona was unwilling to help save their
marriage. She agreed to come because she was keen to save it.
During the weekend they recognised the different ways that they were misunderstanding one another,
were able to be completely honest about what they each saw was a problem and learned the positive steps to take
towards listening and respecting one another.
They arrived barely able to look at one another, and left having agreed joint goals and
aims. They found that the differences weren’t so huge, it was how they dealt with them. They found
that they each had different needs and had a checklist to be able to help one another get them
Jackie and Tim focused the weekend on what the couple wanted to achieve by the end of Sunday - this
was recognition of whether they could mend or end their relationship. Using teaching, coaching, NLP and
walking, they focussed on the key areas in relationships which can quickly make a difference. With
interactive exercises and both couple and individual sessions in a light hearted, fun but deep manner, they were
soon seeing the understanding coming to Jason and Fiona’s eyes.
Being able to talk openly without fear of recrimination, put down and judgement with an unbiased third
party enabled them to really be honest with one another. They
were last heard taking a lovely week’s holiday in Spain!
“We have a long way still to go but now we understand our differences and
from the exercises with you, we know how to handle them. Jason has stopped being so controlling and I’m now
able to look him in the eye. Our intimate life is getting back on track
The program: Two full days from 10am - 6pm called the Two Close to the
Edge Weekend. Couple and individual work with Jackie Walker and Tim Hodgson created a safe
environment for Jason and Fiona to explore what was really going on.
The marriage ending was inevitable, but the affair
ending was too painful
Simon, a successful entrepreneurial business man had fallen in love with a woman 20 years his junior,
the body of a model, witty, intelligent, adventurous and a great friend. His marriage had been falling
apart for years, and this was the answer to his dreams. After a year, his divorce came through and his
girlfriend ended the relationship. His logical head understood, but his emotions took hold and he fell to
Simon wanted help with jealousy as he intended remaining good friends with her. He found himself
panicking and sadness engulfed him. He was unable to eat
Focusing on what he was really afraid of and mining a bit deeper to find out his relationship
patterns, it soon became apparent that Simon didn’t have strong boundaries, lived his life through his loved one
and needed to set out a personal vision for the future.
Over a period of 3 months with weekly phone calls made all the difference Simon needed. He
learned to let go of the romantic dream and build a new one for himself. He was very quickly able to eat
and sleep again and got rid of the panic attacks. As we addressed the jealousy some old stories came to
light and he was quickly and easily able to move on.
"Now the company is unbelievably
successful, work partner and I are in a gr8 place. I'm also in an awesome relationship. Thnx 4 all
your help you made a massive difference'
Sublime to Ridiculous - no middle ground - argue or make
Ruth called when she and her husband had decided to have a trial separation as they were at
loggerheads most of the time and found that they couldn’t live together any longer. When they weren’t arguing, they loved each other with all their
combined might. It seemed however that more and more time was spent in the arguing. Their separation
wasn’t going well as they both missed one another desperately. Her husband was seeing a counsellor at work
and he was addressing his side of the story.
Ruth was keen to save the marriage and find ways to get over the highs and lows which they
had. During our sessions she very quickly realised that she needed to change some of her behaviours and how
she spoke with her husband. She learned that she wasn’t honest, she hid things in fear of there being
another fallout. They were under financial pressure and both addressed it differently.
Jackie could hear the speed at which Ruth worked by the way she spoke, asking her to slow down and
take time for herself from the outset was a priority. Ruth gave and gave to her husband, family and
extended family. She gave to work. She didn’t stop to see how she might be able to get. She
didn’t have enough self esteem to be able to ask for help or see that she deserved it. Working with Ruth,
Jackie had to cut through the bluff so that the real person could come out and be noticed.
Within a very short period of time - in only 4 sessions with Jackie on Skype - Ruth was able
to make the differences needed. Ruth was able to be open and honest with her husband, put into
place the basic skills to avoid arguing, began to ask for help, stopped noticing what wasn’t working and took
some time to herself.
“I’d recommend your work to
anybody who is having relationship issues, and unable to see the wood for the trees. Just following your
simple instructions has given us enormous benefit. I loved that you made me laugh at the way I
She now books in for monthly top up sessions in order to keep things on track.
They are handling anything which comes up
now in a very different way which is working perfectly for them.
Read some Through Breakup case studies here.
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